And...Two Goodbyes in One Week

At the time we got her, back in March of 1998, I thought I was more of a dog-person; however, a cat was what R.J. agreed to let us have, so a cat was what we found. She was a stray cat that had wandered into the workplace of my sister-in-law. Sheila had brought the cat home and immediately named her “Grrrr” for the sound she made, constantly, while sharing their home with (gasp) dogs. Sheila kindly offered this petite calico kitty to us. Matilda came to us at about a year old, with a back story and a kink in her tail that she could never explain to us. We named her after the title character in a favorite book of Laura’s, Matilda and her Kittens. We called her Matilda May, because, “Matilda may, or Matilda may not….” The kids were four, six, eight, and ten (or thereabouts) at the time she came to live with us.

In the past 18 years, Miss Matilda May Traff has grown up and grown old right alongside the kids. She has been present at all major events: birthday parties, Christmases, Fourth of July gatherings, graduations, and more. She posed in many family pictures and walked through many videos before photo bombing was really a thing. She taught the kids that growly meows meant NO and that they could, indeed, clean up cat yack. She was strictly an inside cat, but every once in awhile she would escape, only to lie down in the grass right outside the door and roll around.

We have many family stories involving Matilda, but probably my favorite came early on during her time with us. One day, we hadn't seen the cat for a bit, so we started asking all the kids if they had seen her. It turned out that Matilda had found a comfy, relaxing spot in the bottom drawer of the boys' dresser. At about that same time, David went in his room to get dressed. Apparently, the cat looked up at him from her napping place. David could have none of that. As he explained later, "She was watching me get dressed, and she's a GIRL. Girls can't watch me get dressed." With that in mind, he closed the drawer, cat and all, and then he promptly forgot about her. When we opened the drawer, Matilda was more than happy to be released, and I don't believe we ever found her napping in drawers again.

In her younger days, Matilda was energetic and playful. She chased toy mice and anything else you cared to drag across the floor in front of her. Even when she weighed practically nothing, she could make a thundering noise as she ran across the floor. She always had a shoe fetish. New shoes in the house would attract her attention. She would roll around on them, lick them, and otherwise behave weirdly toward those shoes. She did not like dogs or even other cats. She would growl at animals she saw passing by our house. She even growled at the mail deliverer, a lot like a dog might do. She thought floral bouquets were meant as cat buffets and did whatever she could to get to them so she could nibble. She LOVED curling ribbon and would try to swallow a long strand down her gullet. We pulled several strands back out, after that disgusting process had been going on a while. She enjoyed smelling my chai tea. She loved sunbeams. She made that crazy, throaty meow when watching birds through the window. She often purred loudly from her perch on the back of the couch, behind my head. She bit people who didn’t listen to her warning growls. She had lots of annoying habits, but lots of endearing ones as well. She was unpredictable. She was a cat.

Over the course of the 18 years Matilda lived with us, so many, many things have changed. When we got her, our youngest had not yet started Kindergarten. Now, the youngest has just graduated from college. We lived in a small 1.5 story home when Matilda arrived (whereupon she immediately hid for several hours). We moved to a two-story home since then (whereupon she also hid for a good amount of hours, on moving day).  In our immediate family, we added one son-in-law and are in the process of adding another, as our daughters found their life mates. Many extended family members were added through marriage (and some were subtracted as well). R.J. and I gained great-nieces and nephews whom we adore, and we had the fun of having them visit us. A new millennium arrived. Countless other events moved from future to past, and we enjoyed having Matilda May taking part in most of them. One of the most important differences was that in 1998, I had two parents living.

My mom died a short year and a half after we got Matilda. I realize that this may be a little odd, but it always gave me reassurance to think that “having a cat” was an ongoing part of our lives that Mom had experienced with us, here on earth. When Mom died, the kitty and all of us were just young things. When each subsequent change occurred in our lives, there was always a part of me that thought, “Oh. Now we live someplace Mom never saw. Now we have a car Mom never saw. Now we have family members Mom never met.” For whatever reason, her knowing that we had a cat named Matilda comforted me. Now that connection is gone, too.

I’m proud to say I loved our pesky cat. She lived a long, good life. There is a sadness that comes with saying goodbye to our pets. I’ve had that sadness many times in my life, but only once in my life as a married woman or mom. Matilda was our only pet, and now she is gone. It will take some amount of time to figure out what is next. I started out thinking that I was more of a dog-person, but I have discovered over the years that I am just more of a pet-person. Matilda May, you were a good cat. You were ours, and we were yours, and we will miss you.