It's the Little Things

Family, at Barb's funeral

I’m not going to lie: this has been a difficult December. So many challenges and joys have mingled together to bring me to a mixed-up mess of a place in life. Keep in mind that the month already had its share of landmines, with anniversary dates of both my mom's and dad's deaths lurking in the shadows; then this December began with the unexpected death of my dear mother-in-law. I am still finding it hard to believe she is gone. We spent so much time together each week. While that time is now occupied with cleaning out her apartment and trying to figure out what to do with all her belongings, I know that soon I will have more open days in my schedule. This notion of free time simultaneously produces relief and sorrow inside

Ebenezer and me, after his preview performance of the play

of me. The show that my husband is starring in at the local theatre has been amazing. (He stars in the Rochester Civic Theatre's production of "A Christmas Carol" as Ebenezer Scrooge.)  I have gone to see the play three times and am ready to go a fourth. I love that experience, and yet I mourn the fact that Barb died before she could see her son in this play. She was really looking forward to it. I’m a mixed up mess, like I said. And to add more sorrow to the mix, Barb’s dear sister Mary Beth is also in a hospital fighting for her life. What a month!

An added annoyance this month has come from our vehicle. We drive a 2006 Town and Country Touring minivan. It has been a good vehicle, getting wonderful gas mileage on big trips. We like being able to “stow and go” when we need to transport objects. BUT about a month ago, one feature on the minivan stopped working. It has an electric driver’s seat adjustment mechanism, which moves the seat forward and backward and also adjusts the front of the seat up and down. The forward and backward part of the mechanism works perfectly, but the up and down part got glitchy and then stopped working altogether – in the furthest UP position. Now for those of you who know the height difference between my dear husband (6’1”) and me (5’1” on my tippy toes), you would understand that while he drives comfortably in the furthest up position, that position finds my legs dangling like a preschooler’s. I don’t touch the floor at all, and my right heel hangs in the air below the gas pedal and brake pedal. I didn’t feel safe driving our car, so we took it to the mechanic. He tried a simple fix, just to jar it into a more medium position, but that didn’t work. To replace the seat was going to be upwards of $800, on a car not worth twice that amount. We considered our options and began car shopping. Then Barb died, and time for car shopping was no longer a priority. However, my feet still dangled and I still felt unsafe driving the car, especially in the more treacherous winter weather. It wasn’t a HUGE deal, but it was an annoyance, like I said.

R.J. and I are in the back row, with him cleverly
pointing out our height difference, early in our dating days. 

Fast forward to yesterday morning. I had begun looking at car ads again, and the most recent vehicle that looked perfect had disappeared off the lot before we could get there to test drive it. I was frustrated, not wanting to take the time to car shop and yet not wanting to continue driving the minivan the way it was. We only have one vehicle, so my husband and I commute together.  We go to his place of work first, and then I drive to the preschool. As he got out of the car yesterday, I slid over into the driver’s seat and sent the motor going to move the seat forward, just like I do every day. I heard a big CLUNK and –lo and behold – the up and down adjustment suddenly started working again. I cautiously moved the seat to a comfortable position, with my feet touching the floor mats for the first time in a month. 

It’s just a little thing. In the grand scheme of things, it’s nothing, really. Yet tears sprang to my eyes and a praise of thanks sprang from my lips as I drove out of the IBM parking lot yesterday. Thank you, Jesus, for caring about the little things in my life. Thank you for caring about me. Yes, You still cared when the car seat wouldn’t budge. I know that. And really, one little CLUNK in a world of problems might seem like an odd place to find hope. Nonetheless, there it was, and there it remains. And I am thankful.