For Eric

Today is my son-in-law Eric’s 33^rd birthday, so today, I would like to celebrate Eric. Eric and our daughter Emily were friends first, but they started dating right around ten years ago.  Their early pictures are adorable – like neither one really could believe they were together. They definitely had a lot of good times with their gang at WSU. Most times in those pictures, they are immersed in a group of friends, with hilarious antics happening everywhere around them. Pictures tend to be taken at that type of moment, so the pictures don’t necessarily represent the entirety of their dating life, but still – I think they smiled often in those early days. Each was introducing the other to the things that were important in their lives. It was a time of learning and growing together. The more we got to know Eric, the more we loved him. We were so proud to have a conversation with the both of them as their dating progressed, understanding that Eric intended to ask Emily to be his wife.

It has been a joy to welcome Eric into our family. I love the way he mixes in with our kids. Our four have always had a kind of synergy, and with Eric in the mix it grows to new levels. His interests meld with theirs, as does his sense of humor. I love his quick wit and his easy laugh.

 Emily and Eric were married on July 3, 2010. Their wedding was a perfect representation of them. They mixed in serious elements, beautiful elements, and whimsical elements. The ceremony itself was marked by doctrine and beauty. Em’s dress, Eric’s tux, the flowers…all the elements came together in a lovely way. The limousine ride to the reception offered an opportunity for the new bride and groom to nap. Yup, nap. That is so totally “them” that it actually surprised no one. The cake toppers are one example of the fun they had. And the reception catering being totally gluten free was yet another example of the personalized nature of their planning. They were a team in the planning and the executing of the wedding. And that was just the beginning.

We spent a considerable amount of time with Em and Eric, as they joined us on family vacations, at the family campgrounds, and for all kinds of birthdays and holidays. We watched their love and devotion continue to deepen. They made each other laugh, understood each other, and have always been devoted to each other. They explored questions of faith together and with us in the mix. We have cherished the family times with them.

Eric is smart. He has a bachelor’s degree in English, in addition to almost achieving another bachelor’s degree in a tech support field AND having a good number of credits toward a master’s degree. He has worked hard at several different jobs. He is the most kind-hearted person you will ever meet, yearning for the world’s injustices to go away, or at least to stop hurting his friends.

I have enjoyed watching Eric grow into a cat person. He did not have much experience with cats at the time he entered our family. We had our cat Matilda, who would interact with people on her own terms. When Em and Eric started coming over here for weekly meals, Matilda made some attempts to get to know Eric. He was hesitant and didn’t quite understand her, but he tried.  A little over a year ago, Emily and Eric adopted a cat of their own. Miss Ada is now Eric’s pride and joy. Eric and Ada talk and commiserate over every little unfairness of life. It is adorable. Ada brings him joy and comfort in times when joy and comfort are otherwise elusive.

Over their years together, I have seen Em and Eric work together in good times and in not-so-good times. Right now, Eric is in the midst of a not-so-good time. He is struggling with mental illness, working hard to take care of himself so he can take care of Emily and Ada. He is sick, but he is still the man we have loved from the very beginning. We love him like our own son, and we pray for him every day. We pray for healing, for restoration, for good counsel, for proper medication, for clear thinking, for patience, and for so much more. Walking this road has not been easy for him. We admire Eric’s courage and his determination, even when it is so easy to be discouraged. We admire his continued devotion to Emily. We admire his ability to see humor in life, at least occasionally. We admire each step he takes, when each step hurts so much.

Eric, I am so glad you were born. I wish your birthday could be filled with presents and cake and a celebration of all you are, but we respect your desire to keep it low-key this year. Still, you are worthy of celebration. You are an amazing young man, and I think the world should know that. So, world, if you think about it, celebrate Eric today - not by wishing him a happy birthday, but rather by doing a random act of kindness. Make the world a better place, and do it in honor of this amazing young man we call our son. Thank you.